This post might be a tad late but it is because I have pondered, meditated and ruminated enough on the things that need serious editing about myself. See, I am turning twenty this year. I am about to leave the glorious kingdom of teenage-hood. But truth is, I feel like I am just somewhere sixteen and seventeen and that exact kind of mental state needs to change. 

Honestly, I am starting the year both being overwhelmed and feeling a bit strange. Overwhelmed because I seem to get anything I have wished for. Not exactly all but some and it's terrifying in some ways. Strange on the other hand because I feel I am not able to fully grasp my balance. Life and people seems getting weirder and weirder and I am "weirded" out myself. Recently, I find myself ricocheting between happiness and loneliness. 2012 was actually an awakening year. I learned a lot of things and whatever those lessons are, it birthed into these resolutions...

This 2013 I'll try to...
-Jog on mornings.
-Wake up earlier and witness the sunrise and not wake up when it’s high noon.
-Listen not to reply but to understand.
-Never judge anyone or else I’ll just end up being surprised.
-Stop flirting thyself into an awkward situation.
-Stop being the awkward situation.
-Shut up.
-Focus on one goal and work my out to reach it.
-Control emotions, especially when over enthused over something or someone.
-Delete “assume” and “expect” in my vocabulary.
-Not compromise myself too much to others.
-Stop being too polite. Be real.
-Stop being too available.
-Guard my heart.
-Play smart.
-Accept that the world is harsh.
-Walk my talk.
-Be a better conversationalist.
-Guard my health. Eat healthy.
-Meet more people. Widen horizons.
-Go somewhere.
-Increase alcohol tolerance.
-Be more creative.
-Stop being too attached.
-Stop feigning affection. It’s OKAY NOT TO CARE.
-Screen my stories. Not everyone’s interested.
-Say no to overthinking.
-Stop always feeling responsible.
-Think before talking.
-Say NO when I mean NO and say YES when I mean YES.
-Stop being nice to people who don’t deserve it.
-Grow up. Like seriously.

They don't exactly sound like my usual bubbly self, but I think that is what 2013 is all about for me. 
Time to toughen up.


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